I went to Arabian centre this weekend in search of a manicure. As usual , I engaged in a little window shopping and was nabbed by a sales assistant in the new " Va-va-voom" cosmetics shop.

Now, I've got what appears to be very good, clear looking skin , despite being a smoker. I don't ever tan , which as caused more than a few arguments over the years . HE has a lebanese bronzed complexion , SHE is Irish . Nuff said!

Funnily enough , on the day I went Arabian centre , it was in a bid to avoid a day at a hotel pool!The sales assistant offered a free skin analysis using a machine they had in the store. I thought . " Hey, what's the worst that could happen ? " I figured that seeing as I have not yet hit 30, that the damage would be pretty minimal !

Look and see for yourself the damage I have inflicted on my skin over a couple of decades. Admitedly , I don't wear sun screen on a daily basis , that said, I NEVER spend time in the sun . We live a life indoors here in Dubai , and I am aware that I will easily burn in a couple of minutes, so I just don't put myself in the that sotuation. How stupid I was!

If you look at the second last picture labelled " UV spots" you can see the extent of skin damage I have from the sun. I look like somebody has spattered me with paint . I don't have too many wrinkles ( see pictures) but the sales assistant gleefully told me that it was merely a matter of time . Yikes ! So my warning of the day is , in the words of Baz Lurhman, WEAR SUNSCREEN! I am NOT a sunworshipper , and just look at the damage I already have after 4 years in Dubai running from the car to my building minus sun protection ! SLIP SLAP SLOP people!

Facebook is for EVERYBODY!

Gulf news carries a story about Sheikh Mohammed Bin Rashid's Facebook page!
Yep, thats right , we will get status updates, can nose around his photo albums , add him as a friend and marvel at his internet savvy!

I am not quite sure what to make of this , but I'm certainly amused by the notion of the leader of Dubai opening up a facebook page , particularly when the rumour mill was telling us that facebook might be banned a year or two ago !

His latest status says , "I visited the Ministry of Education today and would like to raise this question: Should the new academic year start during Ramadan or after the Eid holiday?"

I am dying to add him as a friend and comment with something along the lines of ,
" knock yourself out buddy , it's your call - but please, try to let us know what you decide in advance, rather than on the first day of school when Im setting out books for my students - only to discover we have a further two weeks holiday ! Thaaanks! " I would add a few smileys too !

I don't doubt for a second that the page will be watched carefully in case of negative comments , but fair play to him for allowing an entire country the opportunity to poke him ! I think this is hilarious!

King of Pop dies

I'm sitting here in disbelief. Michael Jackson has died in Los Angeles aged 50. As the news spread, hundreds of fans gathered outside the hospital where he passed away . The cause of death at present is unknown ,but he was said to have been taken to hospital after falling ill at home , full cardiac arrest.

According to skynews, wikipedia and Google collapsed under the weight of internet enquiries about his death. Jackson was one of the few performers to be truely known world wide. His music spanned generations and the controversies of his life in later years led his music to take a back seat to allegations of child abuse and other scandals in his personal life.

He was an extraordinary person, in every sense of the word. The eccentricities of this man were legendary, and for somebody that was so private , his life had been treated like a circus for many years. As somebody who has performed since he was 6 years old, and therefore has essentially built up a fan base for 44 years, his death is sure to spark a public outcry, debate , or for some, more burning effigies.

Whether he was guilty or not , what was the first thought that popped into your head when his name was mentionned? Personally , I have not been able to hear his music by for many years without remembering those child abuse allegations , or without seeing those crazy images of him dangling babies over balconies. Trial by public opinion is harsh , and we will never know for sure whether he was a misunderstood genius , or a sick paedophile who happened to be in the public limelight.

Game over...?

There are two main reasons for silence on this blog. The first is that things are going swimmingly, bills paid, stomachs full, minds at ease . Therefore no willingness to record it in any form , lest I tempt faith , stick out the proverbial tongue at my good fortune and gloat. That is just asking for trouble.

Its important to note that the above reason for blogging silence rarely occurs. I haven’t posted since some time in May , because , well, read my last entry - if that wasn’t a smug “ ooh I love my job and all is well” then I don’t know what is ! So, in true and time tested accuracy , things started to hit the fan shortly thereafter. While strife can lead to busy blogging , sometimes there is so much going wrong - that to write it all down isn’t really an option ! And there you have reason number 2.

Having lived here for 4 years, I can safely say that I am not a better person for it . I have rage issues ( please scroll down and take your pick from any number of posts). I have joined an entire population of people suffering from a combination of wanderlust, greed and despair. The golden days of Dubai are numbered. It turned out that those who bleated “ if you don’t like it , then leave” were right after all ! I should have left 3 years ago , when I had not yet completed my transformation in a racist , bigoted , self-pitying and fully fledged rat - race participant.

As someone who initially had a very strong sense of their own identity , I have turned , within one lifetime, into a third culture child. Someone who moves along with the ebb and flow of life , but never quite manages to get a sense of stability .

What does happen to the burnt out souls of Dubai? Our numbers have dwindled in the last 8 months, many have been forced to return to their home countries, heads down and pride dented. Will our compatriots welcome us home , and let us pick up where we left off? Or have we destined ourselves to being urban nomads for the rest of our days , straddling cultures , nationalities and loyalties?

Fun Fun !!

I bitch about work a lot . Ok, a LOT , but in my defence , it's rarely about the kids I teach . ( Ok, so in the privacy of my own home, maybe, just a little , sometimes )

As we all know , the majority of schools here are "for profit" and there is usually a fat so and so sitting at the top of the food chain , who had an excess of money lying around and decided that education was a great little money spinner. He then proceeded to get as many white faces and socially acceptable accents into the school for teaching purposes. These teacher's had qualifications from the correct corners of the globe and had all the appropriate experience.

Sad thing is , once he has gotten these people in , he usually proceeds to ignore all of their professional advice and experience , and cut costs in all the wrong areas. Such as investing in decent literature, facilities etc. Our school started off brilliantly , however we , as a staff have receive more than a few slaps in the face over the last couple of weeks.

That said , I just spent my Thursday night having a sleepover in my school with 14 kiddie winkles, swimming, baking cakes, dragging them around the hall on bed sheets and generally acting like lunatics. We weren't paid extra for this , and it was our suggestion to do it in the first place. I am so delighted to work with like minded staff who are motivated by the development of their kids rather than please the fat so and so . For any parents out there, particularly in Dubai , who feel disheartened by the education system here - please know that the teachers are doing their best - our hands are just tied most of the time !

nine months and counting ...

I could've cooked up a baby in that time ! Who knew PRO's could be so utterly USELESS! Is this the universe telling me to just GO HOME? I think I may have beaten the all time record to wait for a visa to be processed! Still nothing ! Can anyone beat this time frame?

God's Busy... Can I Help? No? Ok, Only Joke, Look Only T-shirt, Me Joke.

I won't go into much detail of what happened during the Rage to the Extreme Concert that took place at the Palace Hotel in Bahrain on Thursday night. Many rock fans deemed the night one of the worst nights in Bahrain's history of hosting rock concerts.

The story is here and here.

Local musician Prasad Jayaruwa of the band Mushroom Massacre was pulled aside by CID officials before being escorted to the CID office in Adilya, Bahrain for sporting what they thought was an offensive t-shirt.

The t-shirt displayed a slogan which read "God's Busy... Can I Help?".

Conservative MPs in the lower house have often cautioned against allowing rock concerts in Bahrain, claiming that many of the people involved were implicated in "Satanic" practices.

The "offensive" T-shirt was confiscated and Prasad later returned to the venue wearing a new shirt bearing the image of pop star Craig David.

I knew it!! I knew it all along!! I always had this eerie and peculiar feeling about him. And now, it turns out he's Satan in the flesh, he's at the forefront, the vanguard for all these "Satanic" practices. Bahraini conservative MP's knew it all along, but for some reason they and the CID just decided, after intense negotiations, to unleash this crucial piece of information to the world. These conservative MP's have alot on their plate these days and they have asked us, the people, to help. We must act. It was always there in front of our eyes. Let us look at the facts;

From Craig David's song library;

7 DAYS

I met this girl on Monday
Took her for a drink on Tuesday
We were making love by Wednesday and on Thursday & Friday & Saturday
We chilled on Sunday

No one, I tell you no one can meet a girl on Monday and take her out for a drink on Tuesday and then make love on Wednesday, Thursday, Friday AND Saturday but STILL be there "chilling" on Sunday.
Normal men would be out the door by Thursday never to be seen.
What Craig David displays are super human powers, hence Satan.

WHAT'S YOUR FLAVA

You're what I need
I wanna taste you (taste you)
Take you home with me
You look so good
Good enough to eat

'Nuff said!!

HUMAN

Oh Lady
I'm only human
Of flesh and blood I'm made
I'm only human
Born to make mistakes

Liar!!, he looks human and everyone thinks he's human. Why is he labouring the point, has he something to hide?

And last but not least...

SHE'S ON FIRE

She's on fire tonight
She's on fire tonight
She's on fire tonight She's on fire, she's on fire
She's on fire tonight
She's on fire tonight
She's on fire tonight
She's on fire, she's on fire
She's on (fire)
She's on fire, (fire)
She's on fire, (fire)
She's on fire, told you before

This is too much!!

Thinking about it, I blame these conservative MP's for all the fallen victims.

Note: For all of you that thought Dick Cheney was the devil, suck it up. He's just a knob.